The Black Karma Team

And lo, a darkness rolled over the land snuffing out all in its path, raining despair and grief in its hateful swath of destruction. No, wait. It just these two guys sitting in the coffee shop who Won’t. Stop. Bitching.

Black karma teamIt’s bitch-a-palooza day!

I don’t know who pissed them off, but they did a great job.

“Don’t they know I have a lawyer? A good lawyer? I’m ready to sue because this is so stupid,” Black Karma One says.

“I have all the papers,” Black Karma Two says. “I’m going to the meeting and telling everyone.”

And this goes on. For an hour. Loudly.

And the karma gets darker and darker, sucking all the joy and happiness from everyone in the coffee shop. Children cry, dogs bay, birds fall dead from the sky, and still they go on over what — as far as I can tell — is the wrong paint color on the neighbor’s house, or maybe lawn ornaments.

Then finally it ends.

“It’s a good thing the women didn’t come with us today,” Black Karma One says.

“I know,” Black Karma Two replies. “I hate listening to them complain.”

Comments
  • Rose Matthews says:

    C’mon Jeff. Tell the truth. You’re making this shit up aren’t you ?

  • Ryan Gray says:

    Maybe I hadn’t noticed in years past, but it seems a trend to me of people meeting in coffee shops and restaurants to do this. Usually, it’s one person going on while some poor companion has to listen. A common component is the talking loudly enough as if they want people to hear. Most times it’s pointless since no one is going to know what they are talking about, but this can be really a problem when it’s some political rant. Unfortunately, between this and every other pair at a table in the coffee shop being some sales meeting, I find it not so nice to hang out there anymore without overhearing some sort of depressing talk.

  • Teresa says:

    Oh I love it! I go to my local Starbucks every day but I don’t hang around so I don’t get to see too much by way of strange customers… although every once in a while they are in line in front of me. I can just see this stuff happening too. Must read through the rest because it’s Friday and it’s a wonderfully funny start to the weekend. ;)

  • Great to have the time at last to check out your website and its just as funny as I expected it to be. Nice to see familiar faces in the comments too! Always fun talking with you on Big Show podcasts and I’ll give you a shout out on my podcast next week. Expect an insult about Starbucks from my co-host. I’m sitting in one right now. Luckily I have nothing to hear other than some slightly annoying jazz and the lovely coffee machine noises! No whining or expert customers ;-)

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