You know when you look up and see someone set their dog on the coffee shop counter and think, “You have got to be kidding me. Again?” Yeah, that.
Ima getta drink wif my dog, mmmkay?
In she walks — or kind of waddles — with her little lap dog, and works her way up to the counter to order her drink. I think to myself how perfect this moment would be if only she’d set her dog on the counter — and then she does. Because, you know, every drink tastes better with a little dog butt in it.
So off she goes down to the pick up end of the counter to wait for her drink. And to put her dog on the counter. Again.
It’s a yin/yang sort of thing, I’m sure. Or maybe a feng shui kind of thing. You can buy that at Walmart, right?
And then she’s gone with her double-jumbo-frappa-latte-extra-whip in hand, and all I can think is, “My god, why didn’t I introduce her to Countertop Dog Man?”
Missed opportunities, my friend. Missed opportunities.