Proud Parenting 101

I’m not a parent, but that doesn’t stop me from watching how other Grups handle the delicate process of raising their young. My local coffee shop is a great place to learn, and based on what I’m seeing, the best way to make sure your child grows up to be a productive member of society … Read more


The word of technology is filled with magic and mystery. It’s a place of wonder and excitement with so many special places to discover, and — Oh! What’s that? Yeah, it seems all you need to keep some people entertained is a laptop, a coffee, and a mediocre Internet connection. OMG! How do they get … Read more

High Finance and Frappachinos

The fast moving world of high finance waits for no one, so you make the deals when they happen. Or in this case, you talk really loud on your phone so everyone in the coffee shop knows you can’t count to three or balance your checkbook. Whatever. I wanna frap an’a new credit card “Yeah, … Read more

Livin’ the Memory, Mom

“Yo, yo, Ima gonna sit here soz youz can gets me some food,” he says. “OK, honey,” his mom says. Wait, what? His mom? Ima let you finish… buyin’ me food, mom! I’m all about people expressing themselves, and if your wardrobe helps you do that, good for you. But when your wardrobe becomes a … Read more

The Melancholy Tale of Emo Boy

What’s worse than pulling a full-on emo attitude? How about pulling a full-on emo attitude in public without anyone to appreciate it. Starbursts soothe the emo heart Poor emo boy had the clothes, the hair, the cigarette behind the ear, and the tablet-kind-of-device-that’s-too-small-to-use-but-too-big-for-your-pocket. You know the one. It creaks when you hold it, and there’s … Read more

I’ll Take One Job, to Go

A guy walks into a Starbucks for a job interview. No, this isn’t a setup for a joke. Ok, maybe it kind of is. Interview time! What could possibly go wrong? Job hunting guy is wearing his best khaki slacks and a well pressed shirt. Hiring guy seems really interested in what he has to say. … Read more

Silver-tongued Devil

“I have to buy a new car,” he says. “Why?” she asks. Dude. Stop talking. Now. “The electrical system is failing, and it’s cheaper to buy a new car than fix this one,” he says. “You just have a tail light out,” she says. “That’s what happens when the electrical system fails,” he says. “…” … Read more

Public Pr0nster

You know where the best place EVAR to look at porn is? In public. In Starbucks. With lots of other people around. Or at least that’s the best place, according to the Public Pr0nster. You can find anything on the Internet! To be fair, the Pr0nster kept his netbook high and tight, so I’m sure … Read more

Walking Wikipedia

Coffee shops are for more than just coffee. Turns out they’re also a great place to make sure everyone knows just how frakking smart you are, and Loud Man was doing a fantastic job. How fantastic, you ask? He was like a walking wikipedia, but with less fact checking. Loud Man did his best to … Read more