Website Super Seller

“I’ve got some great ideas for your website,” he said. “What you need is something like this site that UberSite Design made.” It’s always great to have examples to show your prospective clients. Don’t worry. This is about to go horribly wrong. Dude. Lemme sell you Web sites way better than mine. Prospective Client Guy […]

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Mastering Math, One Kid at a Time

“Am I supposed to factor for X,” the kid asks. His math tutor replies, “Um… I don’t know.” I really hope this kid’s parents are getting a discount rate. Math is hard, kid. Based on the kid’s age, I’m guessing this isn’t differential calculus happening here. I’m also guessing Math Tutor Guy should know whether […]

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Shameless Self Promotion: FBT at Ignite Denver

You know how we’ve shared all these experiences at coffee shops together, but it feels like we’re in a long distance relationship because all you get to do is read? I mean, we aren’t even in the same room. We should get together and do this face to face. How about February 20 at Ignite […]

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Country Disco Girl

In my world, when people listen to music in public they use headphones so no one else has to hear whatever it is that helps them get their groove on. My world is clearly a fantasy place where I don’t have to hear what sounds like country disco, and I won’t get in trouble for […]

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Light Speed Lover

“No, I didn’t bring any books. I have an iPhone.” That’s how the Light Speed Lover started his college biology tutor session. “I think you should consider joining me on a date event,” he said. His tutor was so very nonplussed. Ima wanna date, mmmkay? “Look,” his tutor said. “You really need to have your […]

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Mega Smartwatch Man & His Sexy Mega Smartwatch

Living by the Prime Directive means I can’t interfere with the indigenous life forms in their native habitat. That also means I sometimes have to quietly chase the natives to catalog their activities, or to get a pic of the giant-ass smartphone they’re wearing on their wrist… on purpose. ‘scuze me while I whip this out […]

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Full Contact Parking

I’ll set the stage for you: SUV Woman needs her coffee. Bad. Like, really bad. SUV Woman parks in the business loading zone in front of the coffee shop and throws her car door open. Passing car hits her door, slamming it against the front fender, and keeps driving. As one does. I’ll just park […]

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Pour Me Another, Pal

Guy props is skateboard against the table and says, “Oh God, I drank so much. And you were so messed up, too!” How can I not listen in on a conversation that starts like that? Ima impress you wit my drinkin’, mmmkay? Skateboard Guy smacks the table hard to emphasize just how much he drank, […]

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